A carol for the lonely skeptic

Here's a seasonal carol, just to warm the hearts of those lonely skeptics, shivering in wintry isolation:

Rudolf the Red-haired Post-Doc

You know Next-Gen, and Affy for mapping exomic,
You know HapMap, Illumina, and 1000-Genomics,
But do you recall
That most famous doubter-of-all?

Rudolph the red-haired post-doc
Had a notion truly new!
And if t'were ever followed

You’d have seen how fast it grew.

All of the genome mappers
Used to laugh and say he rants
They never let poor Rudolph
Join in getting any grants!

Then one frenzied deadline eve,
'Santa' came to say,
Rudolph with ideas bright,
Won't you take my funds tonight?

Then all the mappers followed,
As they shouted out this plea:
Rudolph, Oh, thinking post-doc
Please collaborate with me!